Jokes

Random Quote "I planted a rock garden this Spring. Three of them died last week." … [Read more...] about Humor

Hot Air Balloon Joke A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts: "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?" The man below says: "yes you're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field." "You must work in Information Technology," says the … [Read more...] about Humor

Workers Peter was telling a friend that he had just lost his job. "Why did the foreman fire you?" the friend asked in surprise. "Oh," Peter said, "you know how foreman are. They stand around with their hands in their pockets watching everybody else work." "We all know that," replied his friend. "But why did he let you go?" "Jealousy," answered Peter. "All the … [Read more...] about Humor

A philosophy professor stood before his class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a large empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, rocks about 2" in diameter. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the … [Read more...] about Humor

Hi-Tech Supermarket My new neighborhood supermarket has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain. When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and witness the scent of fresh hay. When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle and the air is … [Read more...] about Humor

Spring break; that’s when kids work on their tans and teachers work on their sanity. Spring break; that’s when kids go wild someplace other than school. Spring break is when the only thing kids study is each other. The college kids call it spring "break." Their parents, however, call it spring "broke." Spring break; that’s when students take time off from football … [Read more...] about Spring Break Humor

An elderly woman lived on a small farm in Colorado, just yards away from the New Mexico border. Their land had been the subject of a minor dispute between the two states for years. The widowed woman lived on the farm with her son and three grandchildren. One day, her son came into her room holding a letter. "I just got some news, Mom," he said. "The government has come to … [Read more...] about February Joke

We purchased an old home in Northern New Mexico from two elderly sisters. Winter was upon us and I was concerned about the house’s lack of insulation. "If they could live here all those years, so can we!" my husband confidently declared. One February night the temperature plunged to below zero, and we woke up to find interior walls covered with frost. My husband called the … [Read more...] about February Joke

A Thoughtful Valentine's Day Gift Jim asked his friend, Tony, whether he had bought his wife anything for Valentine's Day. "Yes," came the answer from Tony who was a bit of a chauvinist, "I've bought her a belt and a bag." "That was very kind of you," Jim added, "I hope she appreciated the thought." Tony smiled as he replied, "So do I, and hopefully the vacuum … [Read more...] about February Joke

An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly." The other man said, "What is the name of the restaurant?" The first man thought and thought and … [Read more...] about February Jokes

Bob and his wife live in a big city. One winter morning while listening to the radio, they hear the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through." Bob's wife goes out and moves her car. A week later while they are eating breakfast, the radio announcer says, … [Read more...] about Winter Jokes

Blizzard: 1. A storm that winterrupts traffic. Winter: The age of shivery and shovelry. Headline: Snow Storms May Be Precursor of Winter Think about this: If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be? It was so cold... Starbucks was serving coffee on a stick! It was so cold... the politicians had … [Read more...] about Snow Jokes

A blonde driving a car became lost in a snowstorm. She didn't panic however, because she remembered what her dad had once told her. "If you ever get stuck in a snowstorm, just wait for a snow plow to come by and follow it. Sure enough, pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it. She followed the plow for about forty-five minutes. Finally the driver of the … [Read more...] about Snow Joke

December 8 6:00 PM. It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses Print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow! December 9 We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch … [Read more...] about The Diary Of A Snow Shoveler

What’s white and goes up? A confused snowflake! What do you call an old snowman? Water! What do you sing at a snowman’s birthday party? Freeze a jolly good fellow! What goes: now you see me, now you don’t, now you see me, now you don’t? A snowman on a zebra crossing! What goes ho-ho whoosh, ho-ho whoosh? Santa caught in a revolving door! What goes “oh, oh, … [Read more...] about Christmas Jokes

What happened when the snowgirl fell out with the snowboy? She gave him the cold shoulder! What do snowmen wear on their heads? Ice caps! What's an ig? An eskimo's home without a loo! What do snowmen eat for lunch? Icebergers! … [Read more...] about Snow Jokes

What happened when the snowgirl fell out with the snowboy? She gave him the cold shoulder! What do snowmen wear on their heads? Ice caps! What's an ig? An eskimo's home without a loo! What do snowmen eat for lunch? Icebergers! … [Read more...] about Snow Jokes